Never say never
Hi everyone, Ash here
At the beginning of the year we shared with you why we aren't keen on the word 'resolutions' and why we feel that 'intentions' is a much kinder, positive alternative. Setting intentions allows us to have goals that don't become all consuming - we appreciate and understand that life happens, things get in the way and that it's okay to go at a slower pace when doing something new. In January I surprised myself by deciding very last minute to set the intention to learn Spanish. I was very academic when I was younger but learning foreign languages were definitely not my thing! I really struggled with French and German and choosing which one of the two I studied at GCSE level came down to the flip of a coin because I wasn't very good at either! I told myself for years that I could never learn a new language and still found myself saying that right up until January 2021 when I decided overnight that I was going to learn Spanish!
Here's the thing, our minds are wired to think negatively. Many of our daily thoughts are negative and it's up to us to challenge our thought patterns and begin the change to a more positive mindset. This is something I am always working at, like most people, and I knew that I had been telling myself for too long that I could never learn a new language, just like I had told myself previously that I could never meditate, or run a marathon or have my own business. There are so many things that I have done that, once upon a time, I told myself "I could never". Our mind plays this big trick on us because it wants to keep us safe. It still believes (because it hasn't evolved as quickly as the world around us!) that change equals danger and danger means my life is at risk. It's telling me to keep doing what I've always done because, so far, I'm still here and alive so surely everything I've done is correct, why would I want to take a risk by doing something new?! I have to remind myself that it isn't hundreds of thousands of years ago when venturing off the beaten track meant you put yourself in serious danger of being attacked by something far bigger than you! It isn't a thousand years ago when moving to a different town meant being an outcast and therefore not part of a community that kept you safe. It isn't 100 years ago when you stayed in the same job forever because trying something new meant possible failure, and that failure meant no money to survive! Our brains will tell us to stick with what and who we know because that will give us the best chance of survival (and in a small way it's correct) but we now have the power to lower the volume on that part of our brain that wants to protect us at all costs. We can learn to say "I know you're just looking out for me, and I appreciate this, but the worst that could happen is not the same as it was in the past. I've got this". Having an uplifting conversation with yourself and filling your mind with all the positive affirmations you can think of can be a great distraction from negative talk. You are capable of so many things, don't let your overprotective brain stop you from all the glorious achievements in your future.
What have you been putting off because you think you could never do it? Don't let your brain trick you, never say never! Learning Spanish may not seem that big a deal but, to me, it's the start of rewriting a phrase I've been telling myself since I was 10. No longer will I say that I can never learn a new language because, you know what, I can and I will. Just 10 minutes a day is the commitment I made to myself and I've stuck with it so far! There's a long way to go but...
Yo hablo espanol!
Adios!
Sam and Ash
(She/Her and He/Him)